Posts Tagged ‘want’

Ironically, at that point in my life I’d never drank champagne so I didn’t even know if I’d like it, but thought I wanted it…

Like most firemen, my dad worked more than one job to make ends meet until he retired

“Lafferty, you have champagne taste on a beer budget,” was my dad’s motto for me. Every time I heard it, I’d snarl because my dad was implying an unheard of brand of beer to boot. Then I’d think, “When I’m grown up, I’ll just make more money to afford the champagne.”

My dad understood that there were economic classes and that moving up wasn’t easy. He had a child who aspired to live in a class above his–and he wanted to protect me from disappointment. It’s not that he thought the “haves” were better than the “have not’s”. But he probably had a bias, fair or unfair, that the majority of rich people were snobs and thought their d!cks were just a little stouter than everyone else’s.

My dad was a fireman. At work, he was an Indifferent Big D!ck Contest player. He knew there was a BDC being played, but he didn’t want to play. He felt the annoyance of dealing with the politics to climb the ladder to get a bigger title with more responsibility wasn’t worth the teeny amount of extra money he’d make.

At one point during his career the city was short lieutenants and he’d have to fill in as an “acting” lieutenant from time to time. Even though he got paid more, he didn’t want to be a lieutenant. He finally wrote a letter to the city’s HR department stating he would no longer be an acting lieutenant because if he wanted the job he’d have applied to for it. When pushed my dad would play the BDC, but in general he just wanted to fly under the radar.

Ultimately he believed it was better to be penny wise than chase a Big D!ck Lifestyle and be beholden to creditors and money.

The Big D!ck Contest of Money

This GOP primary season has made it obvious that many, if not the majority, of the elected officials are oblivious to how most Americans feel about the Big D!ck Contest of Money. Two of the most notable gaffs have been made by Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney. These comments came from guys who clearly think their d!cks are so big that they must shield them from the reality the majority of us see clearly:

Rick included in his Iowa caucus speech that “there isn’t a class system in America.”

Mitt told Matt Lauer, from the Today Show, that people who question the fairness of the current tax system for the middle class compared to the wealthy are “envious.”

My dad taught me that America has both a beer and champagne class

Fortunately, we don’t have a caste system. If you want to play the Big D!ck Contest, you have the opportunity to climb the class ladder to live a bigger American dream.

More important, my dad also taught me that everyone doesn’t want to win the Big D!ck Contest of Money. Maybe Mitt envies Warren Buffett’s money, but there are millions of people, like my dad, who don’t envy Mitt’s or anyone else’s money. If my dad won a billion dollars, the only difference in his lifestyle would be he had a bigger bank balance.

My dad can afford branded beer, or even some champagne, but he still chooses to drink the no brand stuff because he’s never wanted to change classes or win the Big D!ck Contest of Money.

Perhaps the Indifferent Big D!ck Contest Playermay be the wisest because they know that the measure of a person really isn’t if they can afford beer or champagne–it’s how they treat other people.